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Below are the 9 most recent journal entries recorded in blondemumblings' LiveJournal:

Sunday, August 7th, 2005
12:52 am
Blonde Jokes
Let's get some of these in here... Why? cause I think they're fun and funny and I want to see all the different ones people can come up with. I'll start with the most traditional and lame ones I know and then with my 2 favorites. :)

Lame and Traditional
What do you call a blonde standing between 2 brunettes?

An Oreo.

What do you get when you put 12 blondes in the freezer?

Frosted Flakes.

What do you get when you stand 24 blondes together side by side?

Wind tunnel.

How do you kill a blonde?

Answer 1: Put straight pins in her shoulder pads and ask her a question. "I don't know" as she tilts her head from side to side. (( I heard this one when I was all of 8 in 1988... 'nuff said))

Answer 2: Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

My 2 favorites
What's the difference between a blonde and the Titanic?

We know how many men went down on the Titanic. (heard that one before I knew what "going down" meant. Took on a WHOLE NEW meaning when I finally learned...)

Why do blondes have legs?

So they don't leave trails like snails...

*snickers* Okay! Everyone else's turns now!

Current Mood: Goofy :)
Saturday, August 21st, 2004
2:40 pm
I love to dye...
Dye baby dye!Collapse )
so which one do you like better?
Feel free to comment!

Current Mood: blah
Thursday, August 12th, 2004
11:14 pm

Check it out!
Tuesday, June 22nd, 2004
10:16 pm
X-posted FYI

Ok, my comp's been down for almost a month, but ish fixed now, and I'm back online. I should be posting lots more soon to make up for disappearing. (if anyone cares :P)

Current Mood: happy
Thursday, May 20th, 2004
12:57 pm
X-posted all over the place
Dyed my hair againCollapse )
12:07 pm
One liners...
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines

Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

I'm not cheap, but I am on special this week

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met

I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Mind Like A Steel Trap - Rusty And Illegal In 37 States

Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.

Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.

Join the Navy, meet interesting people, kill them.

Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!

All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.

I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.

Current Mood: amused
Monday, May 17th, 2004
12:28 pm
The Other Half of the Ambiguously Blonde Duo
What's your name? Samantha Stoner
What part of the world do you live in? Currently, Florida. in 2 weeks? Virginia
How old are you? chronologically or mentally? lol 24
Why do you deserve to be called blonde? Um, duh... I've been a natural blonde all my life. Platinum as a baby all the way until I was 13, then it went golden, then darker until i dyed it red when i was 16. been dying it various shades of blonde, brown and brunette since i was 13. bloodspryte can tell you of my various and hillarious blonde moments... there really are too many to list.
Pets? 3, all male, all cats b/c i'm currently single.
Tatoos? 1 of a faery on my lower back. *hmmm...* need to get a pic of it and post it.
Peirceings? just my ears. used to have my navel, but it was removed for surgery.
One thing you hate: intolerant, annoying pricks who don't understand the concept of the word NO.
One thing you love: Uncle Louie's cheesecake!
Tell a blonde joke: too many to pick from... hmm... okay, go with my standard:
"What's the difference between a blonde and the Titanic?" We know how many men went down on the Titanic.
What kind of music do you like? Just about everything except country and rap.
What's the last thing you ate? eating lunch now: Weight Watchers Smart Ones cheddar cheese smothered broccoli and potato wedges. MMMM *drools ala homer simpson*
First thing you notice about the opposite sex? typically their eyes. Unless they're naked.
What's on your mouse pad? at work? Dell symbol. at home? ish plain blue with pieces missing from where I got bored with an exacto blade. *Evil Manical Grin*
Name a few faves. Book, food, color, anything you feel like shareing. book? The Bell Jar, by Sylvia Plath, food? cheesecake, quenepas, quesadias, steak, lol i love food! color, purple and blue, dark blue. i'll share other stuff later.
What did you do for your last birthday? i had two parties cause my friends love me!
Anything you want to share? not right now.
What do you think of this survey? :)

Current Mood: apathetic
12:24 pm
A Louisiana Ghost Story
This happened about a month ago just outside a little town in the bayou
country of Louisiana, and while it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale,
it's real.

This guy was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a real dark night in
the middle of a thunder storm. Time passed slowly and no cars went by. It
was raining so hard he could hardly see his hand in front of his
face. Suddenly he saw a car moving slowly approaching and appearing
ghostlike in the rain. It slowly crept toward him and stopped.

Wanting a ride real bad the guy jumped in the car and closed the
door, only then did he realize that there was nobody behind the wheel.
The car slowly started moving and the guy was terrified, too scared to
think of jumping out and running. The guy saw that the car was slowly
approaching a sharp curve, still too scared to jump out, he started to
pray and beg for his life; he was sure the ghost car would go off the road
and into the bayou and he would surely drown, when just before the curve,
a hand appeared thru the driver's window and turned the steering wheel,
guiding the car safely around the bend.

Paralyzed with fear, the guy watched the hand reappear every time they
reached a curve. Finally the guy, scared to near death, had all he could
take and jumped out of the car and ran to town.

Wet and in shock, he went into a bar and voice quavering, ordered two
shots of whiskey, then told everybody about his supernatural experience. A
silence enveloped and everybody got goose bumps when they realized the guy
was telling the truth and not just some drunk.

About half an hour later two guys walked into the bar and one says to the
other, "Look Boudreaux, ders dat idiot that rode in our car when we was
pushin it in the rain."

Current Mood: annoyed
Sunday, May 16th, 2004
10:54 pm
Hello All... this is your Mod Bitch
And I figure I'll give you all the info I ask for *grins*

What's your name? Amber, called Ash or Star or a lot of other things
What part of the world do you live in? FL panhandle*eww*
How old are you?23
Why do you deserve to be called blonde?Natural. And dyed.
Pets?yep, kitten named Jynx
Tatoos?yep, pent on my ankles, and getting a new one in two weeks.
Peirceings? tounge, ears
One thing you hate: Gee, I made this survey and I can't think of an answer to this... um... working. Yeah, that's it, I hate working.
One thing you love: My B/F stone_dragon
Tell a blonde joke: hmmm.. What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair dark? artificial intelligence.
What kind of music do you like?yes please? almost anything, mostly rock, goth and punk
What's the last thing you ate?Pinapple upside down cake
First thing you notice about the opposite sex?eyes
What's on your mouse pad?what mouse pad?
Name a few faves. Book, food, color, anything you feel like shareing.fave color, pink. Book, Anita Blake series. Flower rose. Scent, Addidas.
What did you do for your last birthday?got fucked up with my mom.
Anything you want to share?I love to draw.. and I'm hopeing I can find members for my community
What do you think of this survey?I wrote it. It sux.
*grins* piccie time!
blondinessCollapse )
Yea! blondie me!
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